Galentine’s Day: Dr. Jane Frederick Talks Female Friendship and Support

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In case you haven’t heard, Galentine’s Day takes place on February 13, the day before Valentine’s Day. The brainchild of Parks and Recreation fictional character Leslie Knope, Galentine’s Day has since taken on a life of its own.

Galentine’s Day is a celebration of female friendship and gal power. Girlfriends provide companionship, comfort, support and understanding through both our happy moments and darkest hours.

When you’re trying to conceive, female friendships can be more important than ever. But they can be complicated, too, especially if your closest friends are getting pregnant and having babies. But there are many reasons to find strong female lifelines as you navigate the frequently rocky waters of the fertility journey.

You need your friends to lean on
Of course, you should be able to rely on your spouse or partner for support. After all, you are going through treatment to make a baby together. Sometimes, though, another woman is the best person to lend an impartial ear when you need to vent or a shoulder to cry on when crying is the only thing you want to do.

You need a community of TTC sisters
There are many online resources where you can find support and understanding among other women who are trying to get pregnant. But if virtual friendships aren’t for you, there are also ways to find in person female infertility friendships. In Southern California and other metropolitan areas, there are numerous ways women experiencing infertility can meet each other. Some patients have gotten to know each other in their clinic’s reception area, and then formed an informal support network. Others have taken advantage of support groups organized by RESOLVE: The National Infertility Association or other nonprofits.

You need your friends for fun, and to remind you to take some “me” time
As you ride the emotional roller coaster ride of infertility, it can be difficult to remember to take time off to relax and “smell the roses.” We hope you have friends who can take you away from your challenges, and you can, in turn, reciprocate for them. During this time, you may feel like less of a woman because of your inability to conceive. So it’s a necessity to set aside time to do something indulgent–whatever that might mean for you.

P.S.: Don’t forget Valentine’s Day
We hope you and your partner take some time to reconnect on Valentine’s Day and use this time to do something special together, know that someday you will become parents and “couple” time won’t be as easy. Focus on what you love about your partner and what you’ve been through together. Try to make this day about romance and your love for each other.

But also don’t forget to thank your girlfriends the day before on Galentine’s Day. Make February 13 a special day for the women who have been with you every step of the way to overcome infertility. Candy, flowers, and a night out on the town with your GFs may be just what the doctor ordered!


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